Tonight at the gym a man who looked like fuckin Thor asked me out and when I told him I was a lesbian he goes “oh. Chill. You know, my sister and I work out a lot together. She’ll be here tomorrow, same time.”
Like…did Thor just wingman me?
God of lesbians
(Source: 552)
one time a white student from the university in my home town was talking to a student that came from africa to study and said “wow growing up in africa must have been so tough for you” and he just replied “my family could buy you” and walked away
4ins:
Every once and a while you get a glimpse of the person you could be. Grab that. Hold on to that. Work for it. Nothing is out of reach.
i’ve found something better than the d.w. “that sign can’t stop me because i can’t read”
What breaking ice on a trampoline looks like. From here
This is so unspeakably satisfying, holy shit
Omg its like glass
(Source: sixpenceee)
my friend said that whenever she has a bad feeling about her body/appearance, she asks herself “who profits off of this emotion?” and i really love how simple and incisive that is
My boss, who is a grown woman with children my age, just whispered, “Oh, this is going to be so fucking efficient,” before spraying Febreze directly into the ceiling fan and proceeding to cough her guts out when it blew back in her face.
i had a dream i put some mcdonalds french fries in my pocket and when i went to grab them and they had transformed into a box of marlboro cigarettes. nice fucking symbolism dream banksy i just wanted a snack
